So I read books on pregnancy and then there were a few about labor and delivery. I read a few of those too. Then I had the baby and the beautiful truth of what it was to carry a baby and deliver naturally even though medicated, became more real than anything else. I had my first child nine years ago and when I think about the process that I went through to have him I am always amazed! It is amazing!
Because of several things I had to have intervention epidural with my first birth and after that was able to experience complete natural un-medicated births. Those were not only beautiful but empowering and awesome is the best word I can use but after delivery then what?
I am five weeks post my fourth child and I still don’t have it all figured out. I am a more seasoned mother. I look for my direction from the Bible and seek help in prayer, but after all the posts and magazines and everything that I have read and done one thing that I can shout out from the rooftops is that I will NEVER have it all figured out. Every child is different, has needs separate from the others and well comes with a whole new set of challenges. I am in all my experience learning as Solomon ( man from the Bible) began to learn, that the more I know the more I realize that I know nothing at all.
I have figured out that I cannot do this alone, that I need other mothers and fathers and family and many friends to do this life with. That I need to be actively involved in my children’s life and interested in what they like and show them that I care. I have figured out that I have to turn off the chatter (technology OFF) and really talk to them and show them how special they are to me. I don’t have to tell them how great something is if it isn’t but I could guide them into their own greatness.
Nobody has it all figured out so when I am questioned about something that I am doing with my children and challenged as to if it is the right thing for me, I do my best to check my defensive response and listen to what the person has to say, especially if I know they love me. I mean who likes to be told that what they are doing is wrong, but with defenses down you will be able to evaluate your intentions a lot better. If the decision is to proceed as you were anyways then your confidence on the decision will and should be strengthened. If advice is followed then make sure that it is not purely out of fear that you decide not to proceed but because of wise counsel.
The most important thing that I have learned is that I don’t have it all figured out I never will and that’s OK since I am humbly following after the only one who has it figured it out. Christ walked this earth and defeated all for me. I am just trying to live simply in this complicated world.